Hark hear them yell!

I went to the mall tonight.

I’m not sure exactly what it was I was thinking when I made that brilliant decision, as it’s a Saturday and the stores were packed with hoards of people, screaming children in tow, but hey… I made a decision.

The boys had gone to a wrestling match at the civic center, and I decided that what I needed to do was to get out of the house and do some Christmas shopping.

The air was crisp, the holiday music aplenty, and I had made a list of everything I wanted to purchase, organized by person, store and department. Sounded like a fool proof plan to me so off I went? What I didn’t count on was the horrendous pre Christmas Saturday night traffic or the umpteen hundred people that migrate here from the outer ruraldom of Savannah. The city population spikes each weekend as the surrounding dwellers visit the city to shop, eat out and party.

Parking was a challenge in itself, because the novelty of the new mall Target hasn’t quite subsided just yet and the parking lot was buzzing. Me in my holiday cheer, patiently waited for the perfect spot to open, and with lightning speed…dashed into a slot before the little old man in the grey Seville made it around the corner. Muwaaaaah!

The stores were equally hurried as the highways were and each shopper eeewwed and aaahhhed over the dazzling display of purchasable wares. Around every corner was some exhausted looking mother pushing a buggy containing at least two children, screaming in that way only small children know how to do. They did not want to be in that buggy by God! How do I know this?…because that’s what they were screaming in decibels loud enough for the deaf to hear.

“I don’t wanna be in this buggy!”

“I wanna get down!”

“I wanna walk by myself!”

I just smiled at them in a knowingly fashion as I too have been in their very same shoes on numerous non holiday occasions.

Speaking of shoes. Don’t wear your new boots to the mall when you plan on doing a lot of walking. That was my first mistake of the evening, and I’m currently soaking them in last years foot spa Christmas present. My feet…not my new boots.

The second mistake I made was to leave my list on the kitchen table.
Come on now,… You didn’t really think I’d make it to the mall with a list did you?

To my pleasant surprise, and despite my short term memory deficiency, I managed to remember some of the items I’d written down and actually knocked out a couple of gifts.

I hope Santa was watching tonight, and took notice of how nice I was being. There was plenty of naughty going around, but I managed not to slug a single person.

Tis the season to be jolly!