Be the Man Women Desire.

I didn't sleep a wink last night.
It’s almost impossible to sleep when you’ve got an awkward rubber tray in your mouth filled with tooth whitener! The makers of xyz brand tooth whitening gel misrepresented their product when they called it a “comfort fit” mouth piece, because as far as I can tell, there is nothing comfortable about the whole experience whatsoever.

After gagging and salivating all night… I was thrilled when daylight peeked through the curtains announcing a reasonable hour to get out of bed. I hurried to the bathroom, removed the whole mess in hopes that my teeth would be as pearly white as the woman’s on the box. Her teeth have little sparkles on them and I love sparkly things (which is how their marketing ploy got me in the first place).

To my disappointment, I didn’t see any difference then when I went to bed.
Certainly no sparkles …
Not even a lousy twinkle.

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I checked my email, which was an equally disappointing experience only not half as messy.
I’m expecting word from the person who is escorting Little Man on his flight to Belgium tomorrow, arranging final details as to where I will meet her and so forth, but alas…no news yet.

There was however, one spam letter that caught my interest titled.

“Be the Man women desire”.

Um….

How, for the love of God they think there is any kind of pill or cream that could turn me into the MAN women desire is a sales pitch worthy of my brief attention. I would have read the mail out of sheer curiosity alone, had I not been suspicious of virus threats,

so it was deleted unread.

The mysteries of science flushed into cyber space along with my 30% off coupon for Victoria’s Secret, and my daily horoscope.