A horse is a horse, of course….of course.

Unless of course he’s been exposed to some sort of radiation blast.

Then he’s a big hairless white rat with no eyelashes, named Cochise.

Sharon’s post today (Jan 26) made me remember the first time I ever rode a horse. It was on vacation, and we went with a group of people on a ride that started in the jungle and ended with a long gallop along a beautiful white sandy beach.

I, in my best broken Spanish, politely told the guide that I had never ridden a horse before and wanted the kindest, slowest, most sensitive caring horse in the lot, so as not to fall off and kill myself.

He understood my request to be,… “please give me a large hairless rat masquerading as a horse, that will ignore me, stop to graze on bushes off the beat and path, and do nothing it’s told” “oh yes…and after all of that? Please make it gallop with reckless abandonment across the beach for a solid 30 minutes at speeds approaching the sound barrier so that I may hang on for dear life while my ass is pummled down to a size 0.”
Muchas Gracias.

Needless to say I’ve never laughed so hard in my life! From the moment we left, or I should probably say from the moment the group left and Cochise and I hung out to lollygag around while examining the indigenous flora and fauna …, to the exhilarating beach jaunt that taught me my thigh muscles rival any vice clamp ever made.

We bonded.

Master and Beast.

I spoke to Cochise with clear English and strong confident commands. I used the rope that dangled around his head to ever so gently encourage him along the path.

“What? You mean they’re supposed to have a bit in their mouth”?
Not my Cochise. I’m pretty sure a bit would have rubbed a nasty sore on his gums where his teeth once existed.

Oh, and just a footnote? Cochise speaks Spanish. duh.

I’m sure I heard that horse laughing hystericlly at me when our trip was done.
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"A horse is a horse of course, of course.
And no-one can talk to a horse of course
that is of course
unless the horse
is the famous… uh..Señor Cochise.”.

See THIS